Un-LEash

There once was a man - king - named David. Another man - prophet - named Nathan went to him with a story. It goes something like this : A man - poor - had a sheep that was like a daughter; it slept in the house, ate from his plate and brought him joy. Then another man - rich - had need of a sheep; he left the many that he had and partook of the poor man's ewe...the one and only ewe the man had. David, as expected, cursed the rich man for doing such a wicket act...only to have Nathan lift the mirror to his face. He - David - was that rich man. David took Uriah's pride and joy - his wife, Bathsheeba...but not only that. He made sure Uriah didn't stand a fighting chance to reclaim her. And that's when Nathan showed him what he did. David then "went into the house of the Lord and worshiped". The truth is that David was God's. He was hand-picked by Samuel to lead the Israelites. He defeated a tormenting giant - Goliath - with some river stones that a 6 mo...

Prodigal - noun - someone who spends recklessly and wastefully. The Prodigal Son...the parable told by Jesus  "back in the day". The story on the surface seems simple. A man has 2 sons. One son (let's call him PG) decided that he wanted to live it up and away from Papa, so asked for "his" money and went and squandered it. Meanwhile, the other bro (let's call him P.See) was at home, supposedly doing everything as expected. PG ended up living with the pigs (literally), and then came to his senses. He said, "I can eat with the servants of my father and still eat better than this". So he went home. Now Papa saw PG a way off and hoisted his garment and ran to meet him. Papa didn't care that he had squandered his money...he was now home. So what better way to say "welcome back" than to celebrate! The fattened piggy and choicest moo-er didn't stand a chance! But it seems not everyone wanted to celebrate. Big bro said the ungrateful wr...

Dreams...desires...we all have them. As much as we may dream while sleeping, that's not the type I'm referring to. I'm talking about the ones we spend hours day-dreaming about and put a lot of energy into, or the ones we've had since we were years younger. They sometimes change overtime when a new dream takes over, or life just makes us realise that it wasn't really worth the time or energy. Sometimes, we have them for life. We may live to see them realised, or we live continually hoping... In a sense, dreams are a part of who we are, an extension of ourselves. It could be our good side or the naughty one. The dreams could be God-breathed or the result of our selfish desires. What becomes important are two things: 1) from whence do the dream emerge, and 2) which do we keep alive. As a Christian, I strive to keep alive those which I believe are of the Spirit or simply those which facilitate my growth and development. What I've learnt about these dreams is tha...

We all go through phases in life. The character of each varies, but it's oft true that the passing from one to another is by peaks and valleys. In recent times, I've been going through a phase...or phases. One the one hand, I'm happy and fulfilled with aspects of my life, particularly those parts that require giving of myself in one way or another. On the other hand, I am struggling. It's as though I feel stuck and the way out is evading me. The latter is not with me daily, but it feels constant...regularly paced...at intervals. Here's my theory - the heat that we've been experiencing has sapped much energy from my body. But the lack of mental kinetic energy to push through and make certain things happen is just not there as I'd like it to be. It's though I'm watching myself, having gauged where I need to be, yet trying to get there or reaching my hand toward the goal, but not even getting close, or being close enough, yet far away. I was lamenti...

Confession: I don't see myself as skinny or slim...and yet sometimes I do. Let me explain. Everyday I see people. For the women around me, they seem, on average, the same size. The variations are there, where some are bigger and some smaller. The weird thing for me is that I see myself as one of the averaged sized people...I say weird because it seems most people would class me as smaller than average. Yes, people comment on my size often enough, but in my mind, that's just their opinion. I am just like they are. But here's the crazy part. When I go shopping for clothes, or hear talk about weight, or end up in a discussion with someone about clothes sizes, it hits home that my mind is playing tricks on me. It seems I am not the average size that I think I am. I also have moments when I look in a full-length mirror and say, "I AM skinny!" (to myself of course). Based on the brand, I can wear a size zero or size 00 (or size Ooo...as a friend joked) or even a size ...

A few weeks ago, I met someone who asked me a question I've heard many times before - why are you single? I gave a somewhat standard answer - I have not met the right person or something along that line. When I considered the question, I recognised that it was coming from a good place. It seems people generally have a concept that once you are of a certain "quality" - character, look, education level, intelligence, etc - then it's unusual to be single. The truth is that the "Single" box has been checked for some time now. There was a time a few years ago that I struggled with this, thinking something was wrong with me. Thank God I was transformed...so much so that I enjoy my single life. I see it as a blessing and not a curse as society suggests. It's an opportunity to learn about myself, to be free to do things that may be more restricted otherwise, and so much more. Lest one thinks otherwise, let me set the record straight. I do want to get married...

I'm seeking wealth, aka, health! A few years ago, I used to get sick a few times each year. It was almost guaranteed that I would have the flu or a cold a few times, and end up missing work and other events. Slowly it dawned on me - change must come! Though I wasn't in a hospital (and have never been admitted), I wasn't as healthy as I ought to be. And so a change began. One of the first things I did was to limit my soda intake. Mind you, it wasn't a frequent occurrence, but often enough to notice. Following closely was fast food...the ones I'm referring to shall remain nameless, but suffice it to say they are the ones with the fried, oily foods and little to no good nutritional content. This wasn't enough, so I bought a smoothie blender and started making fruit smoothies for breakfast...seems that the only way I would eat fruit regularly. Something was wrong in my psyche that made it so difficult to consume fruits normally. Then I added vitamins to the mix ...

In the midst of life, there is death. Many people transitioned from this life today, and one such was known to me. My thoughts and prayers are with the family and friends closest to her... She lived a life that impacted many. Ms Audrey...may your soul rest in peace. As I reflect on the fragility of life, I can't help but think about my own mortality. I am under no illusion that I am immuned to death because of my youth. I've been on this earth over 30 years, and hope to enjoy 30 more, but it's the Father who chooses when and how. He's not always in the habit of revealing His plans either. In this reflection, I wondered: how did I spend my dash? The first time the concept of the dash came to my mind-space was at a funeral. The Pastor, in his reflection, was speaking about the time between the birth of a person and their passing, often represented by a dash. The end of my dash is a date unknown to me. But how did I or am I spending it? Could I be considered worthy of ...

Isn't it interesting how the most obvious is often the most difficult to vocalize? Ever so often, I observe or find myself in situations where the truth is plain, obvious, staring you in the face...like a large red dot on a white wall...or a carnival reveler in a conservative church service...you get the point. Yet the people involved dance around the issue without any acknowledgement of it. It's easier to observe the elephant in the room than to actually talk about it. The problem : People will live in ignorance and substitute perceptions for facts. This may strain relationships or create unnecessary tensions or simply deny opportunities that could be great. As much as I can recognise this, I won't commit to always taking steps to rectifying any such situations I find myself in...turns out I myself am infected with this bug of no wanting to say the wrong thing or offend anyone. Mind you, there are some situations that demands that one speak out and I hope I do, but s...

Growing up as a very shy, reserved person, touching anyone - handshakes, hugs, and worse, kisses - was restricted to those who were closest to me (ie, family). Even then, I was not very affectionate...just enough. For a long time I was a daddy's girl, so wherever I went with him, I'm under his arm like a man-bag. Grandma was a different story. I can't recall her being a "chummy" person, but I enjoyed her presence and going places with her. So here are two different persons who were a part of my childhood who interacted with me differently...and yet, I knew without a doubt that I was loved by them both. And I certainly loved them in return. I therefore knew it was possible to feel loved not just by touch but also in how one relates to another. Fast forward a few years later. Yours truly has grown up and changed a bit. I'm a lot more affectionate than I was as a child. On doing a self-evaluation, it is attributed to a few things: 1) People are not so scary t...

Friday Being a work day, I spent most of it working. The downside - I was coughing. This was actually one of the worse coughing episodes because by the time I left the office, the headache was different...and not in a good way. It almost felt like something shifted in my head. I am honestly afraid to be in the office now. This feeling is very disconcerting. Anyways, I got home and relaxed a bit before heading to UWI Philip Sherlock Centre for the Creative Arts (aka, PSCCA) to assist the UWI Panoridim Steel Orchestra as a ticket salesperson (Front of House they say). From what I heard from the outside, it was a good concert. After leaving there, I went to a chill spot by Banyan. Twas a nice lyme with friends. It did not hurt to have won a kalooki game :-). I also met the owner who recognised me (my name rather) as a lady who always ordered food in the plastic container (vs foam). She was gracious enough to seek a plastic container to package my meal so I wouldn't need to use the...

A few weeks ago, I had an idea... Recycling at church needed to be revived since we now can have more structured collection of the items. Earth Day 2015 was approaching. Why not have a combined effort? Fortunately, my Pastor agreed and so I gave a presentation at church on Sunday - it marked the celebration of Earth Day 2015, but also served as the official relaunch of the Recycling Programme. Did it or will it make a difference? I suppose time will tell. In preparing the presentation, I was reminded that we all have a role to play in building the body of Christ, and this is mine. The passion within for things of nature and for trying to live in harmony with it are not just about being different. I do it because I believe we are called to be  stewards of earth and quite frankly, it's a part of giving respect to and showing kindness towards others. If more people can see the value in this, even if simply for all to have a better quality life, then imagine what our country woul...

There are many "things" in life that we grow attached to. People. Habits. Money. Ideas. Jobs. Comfort. TV shows. Gadgets...the list goes on. This attachment is likely to have been born out of a need or perhaps circumstance or simply a desire. They serve a purpose in our lives...otherwise, the strings and connections would not last. Life being as dynamic as it is means that there will come a time when we have to cut some of our connections. We have to detach from elements in our lives which have run their course or have become weights pulling us down into a valley...or simply to grow. And so we must let go. In order to do so, we must: 1) Evaluate - Knowing where we are in life and where we are going is the only way to know if our lives are on-track. We must therefore evaluate our circumstances in as unbiased a manner as possible to be able to make an informed decision. 2) Accept reality - It is of no use believing in a lie. Connections and bonds may be very strong, but ...

For quite some time now, I've "suffered" (strong word maybe?) from heart palpitations. I could be watching a movie or reading a book and my heart is pumping out of my chest as though I was just frightened or ran a marathon. Needless to say stress is a trigger. This means nights of little to no sleep, of feeling tired and slightly frustrated, or just generally feeling less than my optimum. In recent times, it resurfaced having not affected me much for months. It's partly because of work obligations and my desire to do everything right and well, without slipping too far behind on the work to be done. I kept looking at the reports not written, the chapter that is lagging, the emails not caught up on, and the myriad of meetings to attend. The more I thought about it, the more the palpitations emerged. Despite deep breaths, it remained relatively constant...at least a few hours a day. A few Sundays ago, I was preparing my Sunday School lesson, and the passage for discuss...

Balance is such an important thing in life. It's why variety is the spice of life. It's keeps us grounded and in tune with different facets of life. It's to keep us humble while maintaining a healthy self-esteem. It's recognising we are beautiful but not arrogantly so. It's finding pleasure in little things, but also in the complex. It's enjoying the moon as well as the sun as they both have their place. I have been struggling with this for quite some time. I find it more important in recent time to figure it out. With the various commitments that I have, I find myself trying to do them well while making time for all the other things that should be just as important. Going a little personal - having a good social life is not supposed to be an option for me. It's a requirement. The last few years were spent learning how to live without relying on people because of where I was in life (story for another time). Now that I have achieved maturity in what I...

The Lion King! Hakuna Matata - What a wonderful phrase! If you read my post about the Bucket List , you would know that Lion King on Broadway was one of the things I really wanted to "do" before I...you know... Hakuna Matata - Ain't no passing craze! I did it! It means no worries for the rest of your days.  Worth every $135. It's a problem free philosphy,   Hakuna Matata! I went with one of my friends who lives in the NY area. Since I was heading there for a meeting, I thought, why not try to make it (once it won't interfere with my work). So, I arrived a day before the meeting, did some warm-clothes shopping, then headed to Times Square to the Minksoff Theatre. We were hoping to get discounted tickets, but it seems this show never really has much of those. I suppose I can see why. Times Square The show started almost on time. I guess people were streaming in and they had to allow for them to be seated. We were in the seats right below t...

I've had few instances in life when I was scared...almost seeing a twilight moment unfolding in slow motion. I had one such moment today. I was on my way to a workshop this morning. I did not have many issues except terrible roads and inconsiderate and selfish people (ie, the usual). I was in the Mona area when I approached an intersection (my right of way) and saw that a taxi was contemplating making his way in front of me. In anticipation of what is normal (ie, him swinging in-front of me when he aught not), I started to depress my brake...and it was like mush. WTH?! Fortunately, there was no car directly in front of me, so by the time the pedal reached the floor, it slowed. Fortunately also the taxi was gracious to allow me to continue unobstructed. No doubt my heart was racing by this time. I was totally unprepared for this. I sauntered on until I reached my final destination (not the movie one thank God). I began to wonder if dem potholes were to be blamed...or if it wasn...

When I was preparing for today's Sunday School, I had options. The one that won out was on the theme "Called to Serve". It was based on the fore-telling of Jesus' birth to His mother . At first I was a bit hesitant to go back over the story we heard so many times just a few weeks ago, but it wasn't up to me. What did we get from the lesson? Faith - Mary was clearly terrified by the sudden appearance of angels (an uncommon occurrence). But she clearly had the faith to overcome whatever fear she may've felt by the news. Courage - In that very patriarchal society, the woman is the one at risk of being stoned to death for being pregnant before marriage. This was not far from Mary's consciousness. And yet, she was determined to fulfill her destiny. Willingness - If there is anything we have in abundance, it's choice. And to serve is exactly that. God knew Mary was willing to carry out that awesome task, and she certainly didn't disappoint. The bo...

I hate flying. For someone who traveled 4 times in 2014 and is likely to travel again this year, that's not necessarily a great "fear" to have. And here's what happened... When I was younger, I loved to fly. I remember looking out the window of the plane and thinking, "cooool". The feeling of take-off was just wonderful! I mean, you are flying! Landing was just as cool...why else would people clap?! And it seems my imagination was in the clouds at time. I told my primary school friends how "pickable" the clouds were and that the toilets would release their content into the sky (some may've hit the ships or birds below). What fun times! Years later, I grew up. And with growing came knowledge. And knowledge can oft be a dangerous thing because that's when it went downhill. Planes were now controlled by people (prone to error). Parts can malfunction when one least expects. Turbulence (especially in small airplanes) is not fun. Take-off and...

I've been on a journey to eat healthier for well over a year now. I was not eating enough fruits and vegetables and oft got ill (flu mostly). Multi-vitamin consumption was haphazard. I decided that life could not continue like that, and thus began a turn-around. It started with a relatively cheap smoothie blender (from Amazon.com). Since I found it difficult to eat fruits (not entirely sure why), I thought - why not drink them? I started with bananas and milk, then added papaya, and now I'm experimenting with various fruits and vegetables. In keeping with my healthy theme, I later tried to prepare foods that are somewhat tasty but good for my arteries. I should add that a new stove (since Sept last year) was a booster of epic proportions (maybe an exaggeration, but hey). I find vegetarian dishes better in many instances. Today, that was particularly the case. I decided to try a veggie pizza. It was partly to appease a conscience which is recovering from some Christmas food ...

I have a Bucket List. Some think that's morbid, others think I should call it a "to-do" list. Regardless, I have and am identifying those things which I want to do before I "kick the bucket", however long from now that is. What have I checked so far? A Cruise! - I wanted to do this for so many years, and I got the opportunity in 2013. I did all of 7 days touring the Eastern Caribbean (St Marteen/St Martin; St Thomas and St John, USVI; and the Bahamas). I did it solo (wasn't my first choice but a friend backed out), and it was so worth it. Going to Broadway! I've always been fascinated by Broadway...actors live on stage giving top-class performances. So in 2012, I went to see Mary Poppins! It was pretty cool. No regrets...worth every bit of the almost US$90 I paid for the ticket (and that was a discounted price). Flying 1st Class! My curiosity was piqued from a young age about the diff...

2013 was The Year of Faith . 2014...the very same. Any regrets? No. Was it successful? To some degree. Faith is built only when there is something to test it, and things there were! Do I have more growing and learning to do? Absolutely! I had several moments of unbelief (and will likely have several more), but that's the growing part. So what next? 2015 has been designated The Year of Seeking the Kingdom (Matt 6:33). I saw it on a wall somewhere and the concept was reinforced in several different ways. So having done some research, I finally have a better idea of what it means...at least for me and the year ahead. He rules! This is not so easy I've learnt. For one, I sometimes have difficulty distinguishing my voice from His. Further, I admit I don't always want to go where I THINK He wants me to. So this year I will make an even greater effort to listen to His voice and follow directions. Peace! Some things money can't buy, peace of mind included. I have se...