Un-LEash

Confession: I don't see myself as skinny or slim...and yet sometimes I do. Let me explain. Everyday I see people. For the women around me, they seem, on average, the same size. The variations are there, where some are bigger and some smaller. The weird thing for me is that I see myself as one of the averaged sized people...I say weird because it seems most people would class me as smaller than average. Yes, people comment on my size often enough, but in my mind, that's just their opinion. I am just like they are. But here's the crazy part. When I go shopping for clothes, or hear talk about weight, or end up in a discussion with someone about clothes sizes, it hits home that my mind is playing tricks on me. It seems I am not the average size that I think I am. I also have moments when I look in a full-length mirror and say, "I AM skinny!" (to myself of course). Based on the brand, I can wear a size zero or size 00 (or size Ooo...as a friend joked) or even a size ...

A few weeks ago, I met someone who asked me a question I've heard many times before - why are you single? I gave a somewhat standard answer - I have not met the right person or something along that line. When I considered the question, I recognised that it was coming from a good place. It seems people generally have a concept that once you are of a certain "quality" - character, look, education level, intelligence, etc - then it's unusual to be single. The truth is that the "Single" box has been checked for some time now. There was a time a few years ago that I struggled with this, thinking something was wrong with me. Thank God I was transformed...so much so that I enjoy my single life. I see it as a blessing and not a curse as society suggests. It's an opportunity to learn about myself, to be free to do things that may be more restricted otherwise, and so much more. Lest one thinks otherwise, let me set the record straight. I do want to get married...

I'm seeking wealth, aka, health! A few years ago, I used to get sick a few times each year. It was almost guaranteed that I would have the flu or a cold a few times, and end up missing work and other events. Slowly it dawned on me - change must come! Though I wasn't in a hospital (and have never been admitted), I wasn't as healthy as I ought to be. And so a change began. One of the first things I did was to limit my soda intake. Mind you, it wasn't a frequent occurrence, but often enough to notice. Following closely was fast food...the ones I'm referring to shall remain nameless, but suffice it to say they are the ones with the fried, oily foods and little to no good nutritional content. This wasn't enough, so I bought a smoothie blender and started making fruit smoothies for breakfast...seems that the only way I would eat fruit regularly. Something was wrong in my psyche that made it so difficult to consume fruits normally. Then I added vitamins to the mix ...

In the midst of life, there is death. Many people transitioned from this life today, and one such was known to me. My thoughts and prayers are with the family and friends closest to her... She lived a life that impacted many. Ms Audrey...may your soul rest in peace. As I reflect on the fragility of life, I can't help but think about my own mortality. I am under no illusion that I am immuned to death because of my youth. I've been on this earth over 30 years, and hope to enjoy 30 more, but it's the Father who chooses when and how. He's not always in the habit of revealing His plans either. In this reflection, I wondered: how did I spend my dash? The first time the concept of the dash came to my mind-space was at a funeral. The Pastor, in his reflection, was speaking about the time between the birth of a person and their passing, often represented by a dash. The end of my dash is a date unknown to me. But how did I or am I spending it? Could I be considered worthy of ...

Isn't it interesting how the most obvious is often the most difficult to vocalize? Ever so often, I observe or find myself in situations where the truth is plain, obvious, staring you in the face...like a large red dot on a white wall...or a carnival reveler in a conservative church service...you get the point. Yet the people involved dance around the issue without any acknowledgement of it. It's easier to observe the elephant in the room than to actually talk about it. The problem : People will live in ignorance and substitute perceptions for facts. This may strain relationships or create unnecessary tensions or simply deny opportunities that could be great. As much as I can recognise this, I won't commit to always taking steps to rectifying any such situations I find myself in...turns out I myself am infected with this bug of no wanting to say the wrong thing or offend anyone. Mind you, there are some situations that demands that one speak out and I hope I do, but s...

Growing up as a very shy, reserved person, touching anyone - handshakes, hugs, and worse, kisses - was restricted to those who were closest to me (ie, family). Even then, I was not very affectionate...just enough. For a long time I was a daddy's girl, so wherever I went with him, I'm under his arm like a man-bag. Grandma was a different story. I can't recall her being a "chummy" person, but I enjoyed her presence and going places with her. So here are two different persons who were a part of my childhood who interacted with me differently...and yet, I knew without a doubt that I was loved by them both. And I certainly loved them in return. I therefore knew it was possible to feel loved not just by touch but also in how one relates to another. Fast forward a few years later. Yours truly has grown up and changed a bit. I'm a lot more affectionate than I was as a child. On doing a self-evaluation, it is attributed to a few things: 1) People are not so scary t...