Finding Purpose and Praise in Rejection

The Stone that the builders rejected...

Rejection...never an easy word to internalise when it applies to our lives. In one way or another, everyone of us has faced rejection. And conversely, I suspect that we have also done some rejecting ourselves. It could be a job, a relationship, a training opportunity, a school, a party, wedding, banquet...hearing a "no" when we ask, apply, seek, reach out or anticipate can leave us feeling deflated, hurt, heart-broken, sad, angry, jaded...the list goes on.

I have found myself thinking about this concept of rejection more and more in recent time. I reflect on my own life and can count numerous ways that I have felt this way. In doing some spring-cleaning, I found letters sent by companies telling me I didn't get the job. I recall the "not accepted" from my application to med school. Feeling rejection in my familial and friend relationships is perhaps among the most memorable or more accurately, the ones that cut the deepest.

In going through the Old Testament some time ago, the story of Leah struck me. She was the sister who was married to but not chosen by Jacob. Leah was the older of the two sisters, and their father tricked Jacob into marrying her. Rachel was the one that was sought after, that was wanted. And Leah knew she was unloved; she was rejected in getting what she desparately wanted - the love of her husband. 

But the best of all accounts happened when Jesus walked the earth as a man. He was celebrated, but was also rejected. Matthew 13:53-58 recounts one instance where Jesus went to His hometown. The people there accepted that His teachings were wise but refused to believe because He was a carpenter's son. Jesus responds that "a prophet is honoured everywhere except in his own hometown" (v57). His most defining moment here among mere mortals was fuelled by rejection; His people, the ones He came to save, did not accept His Kingship. They instead chose to crucify innocence. But as though that were not enough, Abba Father turned His head away. It is unfathomable the hurt and loneliness with rejection from the One who gives strength, courage and life, and yet, Jesus bore it all so I can have life and have it more abundantly (John 10:10).

....has now become the cornerstone! (Psalm 118:22)

Jesus was on earth for one reason - to be our Saviour. And fulfilling that mandate meant facing rejection. So He did. He did not promise that we would be spared; in fact, He spoke about people taking up their cross to follow Him (Matt 10:38). He knew life would be hard, and rejection is no small part of that. His admonition to be light and salt means that some will not want us around, that our lives will not always be acceptable and that we may be seen as counter-cultural but not in a good way. 

When I think about the story of Leah, I can imagine that life for her was difficult. Feeling unloved and rejected is what we try to avoid in life, but that was her lot. But the beauty of her story should not be missed. The favour that God bestowed on her, through her son Judah, would centuries later be the tribe from which Jesus descended. Her rejection had purpose. She realises this when her 4th son, Judah, was named. Her other sons reflected her sruggle with being rejected (eg, Simeone was so named because God heard that she was not loved). Judah, however, shows the shift - "this time I will praise the Lord" (Genesis 29:35).

Rejection is never easy, but I dare say it's necessary. I look back and think of how fortunate I am to have been rejected. The job I wanted but did not get led me to my current journey, one that is fulfilling and where I know I must be. Being rejected by people also shaped me in more ways than I can count - my character is the better for it. But rejection is not in my past alone; it is very much still my reality. I therefore pray for wisdom and grace to manage it, knowing that in the end, it will work out exactly as it should.

The stone that was rejected - Jesus - became the cornerstone. He set the example for us. No matter who rejects us or how many times it happens, we must be resolute in pursuing our purpose. I still hurt, I feel pain and even anger at times when rejected. But I know there is purpose in the pain. And for that, I will praise the One who will be with me every step of the way.